Sex, Lies and Videotape
Can you write honestly when you know someone else is reading?
First things first, I think that the "question as introduction to written section" is not SJP-like. It is merely a form of organization, and particularly, in this group format, is helpful. Then again, this is coming from a woman who organizes much of her writing in bullet points, "running" lists, and indented block quotations. I find that a lot of times (most times) when I sit down to write, I want to write, but inspiration has not yet seized me. Truth be known, inspiration only seizes me when I am walking down the street without pen or paper or any other means of recording anything and I have a "things that make you go Hmmmmm" moment. And I will myself to remember. And I inevitably forget. And it bothers me. I have written the great american novel approximately 17 times in my head and have managed to mentally misplace it every time.
Actually, that isn't true. I haven't ever written a novel. Mentally or otherwise. I don't seem to be able to sustain the linear progression in my head required to give a fictional story a beginning, a middle and an end. That and the fact that I fear writing dialogue. Anytime I have ever tried it is flat. Somehow the conversations of my fictional characters are never as vibrant as the voices in my head. So being paralyzed by the creative leap required to generate characters that are not me, or the varying phantasmogoric iterations of me, when I do write (when I have written), I write what I know: me.
But in getting back to the original question above (finally) - I think it is actually two questions: (1) Can you write honestly when you know others are reading, and (2) can you write honestly for yourself?
To see your own truths spelled out - even the ones you think you have always known - is a moving thing. It somehow recalibrates your perspective. It frees you. You always knew it, you always harbored it, but now it's out there. And now you are free. And often, you will find, you are not alone.
Many of us putter till the early a.m. - I watch repeats of the Nanny from 12 to 1 a.m. every morning. I also don't make it to the office till 10 a.m. Sometimes because I can't get up, other times because I just can't bring myself to face the day till then (and the 10 seems to be about the point where one is really pushing the envelope of socially acceptable times to get to work). I also like to avoid seeing my roommates in the morning.
As for others: The difficulty seems to rest mostly with people you know. Confessional formats with folks you don't know is easy. Really, what do you care if that guy in Dubuque, Iowa thinks you are odd for eating crackers in bed? On the other hand, if your friends think you are a slob for indulging in Wheat Thins and Cheddar while amongst your bedsheets, you are more invested. Even worse if you are revealing that it annoys you that someone you know absolutely loves to consume Saltines in their jammies. Seems almost like a passive aggressive way of picking a fight.
I think one needs to try to be as faithful as possible to one's feelings and one's take on situations one chooses to write about. There is no truth, there is only how you see it. Not right, not wrong: it just is.
The real question is then what you choose to write about in the first place.
(Damn, now I ended with a question too. Does this mean I do not get to pass GO and collect $200?)
First things first, I think that the "question as introduction to written section" is not SJP-like. It is merely a form of organization, and particularly, in this group format, is helpful. Then again, this is coming from a woman who organizes much of her writing in bullet points, "running" lists, and indented block quotations. I find that a lot of times (most times) when I sit down to write, I want to write, but inspiration has not yet seized me. Truth be known, inspiration only seizes me when I am walking down the street without pen or paper or any other means of recording anything and I have a "things that make you go Hmmmmm" moment. And I will myself to remember. And I inevitably forget. And it bothers me. I have written the great american novel approximately 17 times in my head and have managed to mentally misplace it every time.
Actually, that isn't true. I haven't ever written a novel. Mentally or otherwise. I don't seem to be able to sustain the linear progression in my head required to give a fictional story a beginning, a middle and an end. That and the fact that I fear writing dialogue. Anytime I have ever tried it is flat. Somehow the conversations of my fictional characters are never as vibrant as the voices in my head. So being paralyzed by the creative leap required to generate characters that are not me, or the varying phantasmogoric iterations of me, when I do write (when I have written), I write what I know: me.
But in getting back to the original question above (finally) - I think it is actually two questions: (1) Can you write honestly when you know others are reading, and (2) can you write honestly for yourself?
To see your own truths spelled out - even the ones you think you have always known - is a moving thing. It somehow recalibrates your perspective. It frees you. You always knew it, you always harbored it, but now it's out there. And now you are free. And often, you will find, you are not alone.
Many of us putter till the early a.m. - I watch repeats of the Nanny from 12 to 1 a.m. every morning. I also don't make it to the office till 10 a.m. Sometimes because I can't get up, other times because I just can't bring myself to face the day till then (and the 10 seems to be about the point where one is really pushing the envelope of socially acceptable times to get to work). I also like to avoid seeing my roommates in the morning.
As for others: The difficulty seems to rest mostly with people you know. Confessional formats with folks you don't know is easy. Really, what do you care if that guy in Dubuque, Iowa thinks you are odd for eating crackers in bed? On the other hand, if your friends think you are a slob for indulging in Wheat Thins and Cheddar while amongst your bedsheets, you are more invested. Even worse if you are revealing that it annoys you that someone you know absolutely loves to consume Saltines in their jammies. Seems almost like a passive aggressive way of picking a fight.
I think one needs to try to be as faithful as possible to one's feelings and one's take on situations one chooses to write about. There is no truth, there is only how you see it. Not right, not wrong: it just is.
The real question is then what you choose to write about in the first place.
(Damn, now I ended with a question too. Does this mean I do not get to pass GO and collect $200?)
posted by CLC at
11:59 AM
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